Vulvodynia: What it is & How to Cope
Are you hesitant to talk about what’s going on with your vulva? Obviously, you aren’t alone. Our genitals are not frequent topics of conversation on their best day. And when they are burning, stinging, itching or feeling raw? Well, then we often try to tough it out, self-diagnose, or self-medicate before seeking the relief and optimal care required.
If you suffer from vulvodynia (chronic pain in the vulva) you understand completely. And you likely struggle to cope with the impact on your life and relationships. Still, you needn’t be ashamed or suffer in silence. You’ll feel better with more information, more support, and a path forward.
Not so sure if what you’re experiencing is actually vulvodynia? The first step is an honest conversation with your care professionals. Also, consider the following:
Is it Vulvodynia? How to Know
Your vulva is the area on the outside of your genitals. This is where painful sensation and discomfort are centralized. Vulvodynia, as a general rule, describes pain that persists for three or more months.
If you are suffering this way, you may be able to link the condition to a specific event. however, if you don’t know what’s causing such pain, you are actually part of the norm. Most women have nothing obvious causing their vulvodynia. This, of course, causes a great deal of additional emotional distress and frustration.
Are there causes or risk factors for vulvodynia?
Yes. Aside from physical injury, the development of vulvodynia is often linked to other issues such as:
anxiety disorders
depression
chronic or past physical or sexual abuse
post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
How can vulvodynia impact your life and relationships?
Vulvodynia isn’t life or death. But, as far as chronic conditions go, the misery, frustration, and embarrassment you may be enduring can feel worse than a life-threatening ailment to you. You may be experiencing one or more of the following circumstances:
Sitting for long time periods is painful and may make work, school, childcare, recreation difficult
Sexual intercourse can be a virtual impossibility and wear heavily on your relationships.
Like any kind of pain, it can affect the ability to sleep well.
Swimwear, underwear, or any close-fitting clothing may be limited.
The pain you live with can lead to deeper issues such as sexual dysfunction, depression, and anxiety
So, after you connect with your gynecologist or primary care physician what can you do? In recent decades, the resulting depression and anxiety linked to vulvodynia have indicated that mental health counseling is beneficial as well.
Are there ways to improve your life with vulvodynia?
Yes! While it’s true that vulvodynia makes daily life difficult, there are things you can do to ease the burden on you and the people you care about. Give yourself a break if you feel overwhelmed. It’s okay if you’re sick of the situation and even angry about how it impacts your life. These are completely normal emotions, particularly for women in your situation.
Coping with your vulvar pain isn’t easy but it isn’t impossible either. Fortunately, there a few key measures you can take to feel better physically and emotionally.
Seek out a community. The support of women, in-person, through a support group, or in an online forum, will give a place to share and learn. Like-minded women who get what you’re going through can ease your sense of isolation and provide ideas for coping and living well with vulvodynia.
Practice breathing, and stress reduction. Relaxation can help tame your body and mind. Try simple breathing techniques and meditation to help you reduce tension in your muscles, mind, and interactions.
Track your pain. To get a good sense of what’s going on with you physically and emotionally, keep a journal of your vulvar pain, moods, and activity. This way, you can better understand and communicate to professionals how the pain is linked.
See a therapist. Fully processing your situation and allowing yourself to express your emotions is a vital part of coping well. Reach out with your concerns and develop coping skills to make life with vulvar pain doable. Sex therapy too, may be another support that can restore the intimacy you’ve lost.
Finally, working with a therapist who is compassionate, experienced, and uniquely qualified to help you with your vulvodynia can make all the difference. You deserve relief and a way forward. Let me help. Please read more about sex therapy and reach out to schedule a session soon.